I had an interesting conversation today I thought I would share. I was discussing with a dear friend of mine about how large families seem to be making a comeback. It seems like more and more young mommies are making the choice to stay home and have large families. I am making that choice myself, but not without resistance.
My parents are from the generation where you have 2 kids, both parents work, and you see just how successful you can be. I was a daycare kid, my mom always chose to work and that was all I knew. Did I turn out fine, yeah. But is that what I want for my kids? Simple answer: no
It seems like our society now days is so career driven and we are losing sight of the basics. I actually know of a wonderful mother of 4 who unexpectedly was recently blessed with baby #5 and was fearful for others to know. Why? Well its because of this stigma society attaches to large families. They are no longer seen as a blessing, but a burden.
At my baby shower for my second daughter we played a game: everyone had to write down a piece of advice for me. I had 5 people write down, "stop at 2!" That was heart breaking for me. That is really the best thing to tell me? Not "hug them every chance you get" or "always kiss them goodnight", it was never have any more
But, I think this is slowly changing again. I think more and more young mommies are choosing to go back to the pre-feminist days where mom stayed home and dad worked. Where your family was the top priority of a woman. Where she was fulfilled being a mom and wife. And that gives me pride! We are making the conscious change to say "We chose to serve our families first, no matter what the cost" Now it is just getting that stigma to go away.
I recently graduated with my BBA this past December. With what should have been a joyous time, it was overshadowed with everyone asking, "So are you finally going to work?" I began to feel all this pressure to go into the work world because "why pay for an education you will never use." I started making myself miserable as a stay at home mom, telling myself I wasn't fulfilled from it. I began applying for jobs and interviewing. It seemed like I found a million excuses to turn down every job that was offered to me. Then it hit me, I was turning them down because I felt convicted. I was turning them down because deep down I longed to serve my family at home.
I am now happier than ever, fully enjoying every second of staying at home with my girls. I know this is my purpose. And you know what? Staying true to my heart has worked because i have a possible job opportunity to work full time from HOME for a non profit agency so close to my heart. And if that doesn't work out? I say Oh well!, because I know ,and have a peace, that everything will work out where I can serve in the way the Lord created me to. I can be a wife and mother and know I am doing that with all the ability I have to do it.
So lay off SAHM and large families society! We are helping restore a little bit of family values that seemed to have been lost. I see so much divorce and brokenness in the world today. I just want to look back in 50 years and still be looking back with my husband. With my children proud of the example, love, and peace that were provided them. Is it always easy? NO! Do I feel like I am going to lose it? At least once a day! Would I trade it for the world? Never!